The Way Maker
Si nada es cierto, todo es posible.
If nothing is certain, everything's possible.
To trace new trajectories takes discernment.
To our system, setting new intentions feels like forging a path where there wasn't one before. It feels unsafe and uncomfortable β all the things our system tries to avoid, and that we must work through.
And while masters of behavioural sciences already paved the way for this β I believe today we have one more layer to consider.
Our current context.
To me, one thing is to face the confusion that results from intentional work on healing, new habits or life choices. Another thing is to do so in an historical context of unprecedented volatility, complexity and sense of uncertainty.
When both our inner and outer landscape shift our chance to write new stories instead of confirming the established ones depends on one single thing: our ability to discern our actions.
To respond instead of react β no matter what happens around us.
In my experience, without intentional work towards that, we will just be reinforcing the sae story, under new distracting colours.
Anatomy of a Way Maker
So how do we find clarity and cultivate alignment when both our inner and outer landscape shift?
To me, it boils down to having 3 things:
- a defined anchor that we can always fall back to
- clear and actionable operating principles
- flexible trust around plans and outcomes
In my experience, the rest always follows.
In this post we will see how to:
- Lay your Anchor
- Set your Operating Principles (OPs)
- Test your OPs
- Verify your Anchor-OPs alignment
- Activate your Way Maker
Let's dive in.
Ingredients and landing
To craft your Way Maker you'll need:
- your journal / pen + paper
- a quiet space
- ~1.5h of uninterrupted time (no phone)
- Optional: your Year Compass workbook.
To land for this exercise, ask yourself: what is your journey ahead about?
Only you know. At heart. What's your intended direction? What do you want to stand for, or embody more? Journal for a few minutes, or go through your notes. If you've done the Year Compass, look at your Tree Map, intentions or vision board.
What are the core themes?
Then take pen and paper β and draw 5 dots: 4 in a rectangle, and 1 below.
*β A personal note
When does it make sense to do this exercise?
My personal take: considering that most of our cultures use a made-up calendar, please remember that you can re-set your year, cycle or priorities any time you want. We all have our own seasons, and it's key to honour them.
Let's all gift ourselves the resets we deserve, any time we truly need them.
1. Lay your Anchor
Strong wings, deep roots.
We can only fall as low as our established baseline. Our Anchor is our non-negotiable point of reference and stability.
To lay it, ask yourself:
- What is the one thing, word or principle that you choose as the core beating heart of your journey?
- What's the one thing that even if everything else falls you are always able to rest on?
I think about the Anchor as my core root. This also means that it's the one thing we need to cultivate and prioritise β more than anything else. That's what will enable us to rest on it.
When you find that word or concept, write it down by the lower dot. That will be your Way Maker Anchor.
*β Examples of Anchors and practices
- Resonance:
- I only follow and align with what feels truly resonant
- Only resonant things are right for me.
If we want this to be our Anchor then our priority will be to cultivate the ability to feel whether people, things and situation are in resonance (or not) with us. Non-negotiables: a clean diet, no alchool, daily time in nature, ...etc. - I can be a seed:
- New beginnings need a stage 1 to get to 2, and 3
- I trust that it's natural to feel disoriented as I'm forging a new path
The themes of an Anchor like this is supporting a phase of seeding a brand new chapter, then we'll choose practices that help us cultivate that: learning to stay in VS social distractions, grounding meditations, joining groups with people in a similar phase, ...etc. - Sacred Pause:
- I can always pause and take time and space.
- If things are not clear, then I trust it's not time to know or act yet.
If we want our Anchor to support a journey of healthier behaviours and boundaries when we feel challenged, then we'll prioritise practices that help us develop that muscle: nervous system regulation, non-violent communication, inner-child work, ...
PS β I'd love to know what Anchor you choose! If you share any of this online, tag me so I can see your craft β @meg_pagani
2. Set your Operating Principles (OPs)
Our cornerstones define our playground.
Your OPs are the core principles you want to operate by to forge a path aligned with what truly matters to you.
To set your OPs, ask yourself:
- If your journey had 4 core new ingredients to focus on, what would they be?
- What are the attitudes or tendencies that you want to improve the most?
- How can you summarise them into a 2-3 words concept each?
The OPs are like values, but actionable.
They must be things or concepts that help you in situations or relationships β to discern between reacting in old ways VS responding. Literally A vs B.
They are also very unique to you. A great way to identify your OPs is to think in terms of your old attitudes as prime material, and identify their higher octave.
*β Examples of OPs
- One of my historical prime material is protectiveness. In order to try to deal with my sensitivity and PTSD, I developed the tendency to look at things in categories: black or white? Safe or unsafe? Right or wrong? With me or against me? Ambiguity triggers fear and the need to categorise and control, so "we can be safe".
Today I call it seeing life like a chessboard.
So what would it be its higher octave? Over the years, what came up for me was: to do things like nature. No black and whites, no categories.
And so the OP for me became: From Chessboards to Gardens. - Another example is a new OP of mine β Sleep On It.
In order to counter-balance my historical tendency to overwork, to prioritise things and people I care about over myself (and even take decisions when I'm not in my best state), and important OP became to radically take time: learn to Sleep On It and rest first, just by default. It took a while to create a new baseline, but it did work. And the results were, and still are, incredible.
3. Test your OPs
A compass is either an effective discernment tool, or it's decoration.
Your 4 Operating Principles need to be clear, directional and effective for the specific kind of situations that tend to challenge you.
So how do we test them?
- Select the first OP you want to test
- write down: what kind of situation or challenge would you like this OP to guide you through? Describe it in detail, recall how it normally feels.
- Run it through the OP β imagine: when the Situation A arises, how would this OP help you pause and respond X instead of reacting Y?
- Ask yourself: does the OP feel effective and clear enough? Does it give you enough clarity and sense of direction for you to discern between reacting VS responding?
If yes, great! Move to the next one, and repeat the process for each of the OPs.
If not, find ways to refine the OP in ways that would make it more effective for you. When you found how, do the same for the other 3 OPs.
*β Example of tests
Let's take the above example β the OP from Chessboards to Gardens. In order to test it:
- Situation: ambiguous situations or behaviours of someone I care about. The trigger state normally would include to feel physical contraction and unconsciously enter strategy mode to pressure and polarise the situation into "yes or no", "black or white", etc.
- Run through the OP: the image of the chessboard is very powerful for me. I've been testing this OP for weeks now and I can tell that it allows me to immediately feel if I'm activated and in black/white mode β and to do what all good tools help us do:
1. Catch me in the triggered state
2. Pause
3. Choose better responses and behaviours
Test your OPs in a similar way. Make it specific β they need to be effective and supportive to you, in the specific situations that test you.
4. Verify your Anchor-OPs alignment
Like in almost anything, harmony is key.
Take a few moments to look at your Way Maker, with its Anchor and the 4 OPs.
Then ask: are they aligned? Are all parts of this compass and tool in harmony with each other? If they'd create a symphony or a story, would it feel coherent? You can try to reason through it, but it won't work. This is something that can only be felt.
If it does feel aligned, then:
- connect all the dots
- design your emerging route.
- choose a symbol or colour to put on top that represents alignment to you.
If the elements don't feel aligned yet, keep refining them until they do.
5. Activate your Way Maker
Your Way Maker is ready.
There's nothing left to do, aside of making it part of your life.
How can you put it somewhere where you see it often? How can you recall it throughout your day, and especially when you need it the most β in moments of challenge or uncertainty?
My favourite way to do this is with beauty. Beauty has great power. Beauty is capable to make us stop in the middle of anything β and remind us what matters.
So I personally took a picture I resonate with, and used it as background to draw my Way Maker on top β and put it as my phone wallpaper. You can do the same, of find your own version of this.
But make sure you do something to activate it.*
*β a note on this
Something done at 95% has the same effect as something done at 1%
Many of the ancient books of practice and wisdom start with how to finalise and close the practice firstβ before explaining the practice itself.
This is because a practice, like anything, has a beginning and an end. Without the end, its effects can't activate and ripple through us.
So whatever way you choose to activate your Way Maker, just make sure you do it β in a way that helps you go back to this tool and contemplate its principles until they get fully integrated in how you operate.

Conclusions, and a final note.
Alignment doesn't happen or exist in a vacuum.
Alignment is something we craft β choice, after choice, after choice.
My final recommendations to make the best out of this tool are:
- Look at it. Contemplate it. Doodle it on your journal. Go back to it as often as you can β especially at the beginning. Notice the situations that emerge. Track your attempts to use the tool, and especially your progress. Update and refine it over time, to make it really effective to you.
- You will be tested about it. "When you ask life for patience, life doesn't give you patience β it gives you a queue at the bank". If these are the new ways you want to operate in the world, situations will emerge to test and enable you to develop those muscles.
- Take it as a practice. Blooming is always imperfect, and on its own time. This is not a tool to control things. It's a tool to develop discernment and agility to navigate challenging times in alignment with what matters. What will emerge from it, only time will tell β and it will depend on how we show up.
And finally, thank you for your trust.
Whenever you will be reading this, I can promise you I'm still practicing with (some version of) my own Way Maker, with its Anchor and OPs.
My practice taught me that sharing it with friends and loves helps β it creates a shared language to support each other in how we want to show up, no matter what happens around us. If you feel drawn to do the same, please go for it.
It's never been more important to braid roots and branches.
With love,
~M*
PS β if you end up drawing it and sharing it somewhere, please tag me! I'd love to see your craft: @meg_pagani. And if you have questions, or you'd like to share your journey with this, please reach out. π€
Some of the "making of" and behind the scenes.
Give it time. It will come together.
A final note.
Forging new paths takes courage.
Without getting into the details of it β just imagine that any time we are trying to do something different than our established patterns, we have:
- 7+ generations of epigenetic programming
- centuries of restrictive cultural scripts
- our subconscious mammal fears
all synchronized and suggesting (as in: screaming) to our system hat if we operate differently, our loved ones will leave us and/or we'll die. (Yes, our brains can be that dramatic).
So next time you find yourself thinking "why can't I just do this?" - please remember to breathe. The fact that we feel that way is the sign that we're doing it.
With love,
~M*
One of my favourite references for this work, that helped me identify my Anchor and Operating Principles, is the Gene Keys book and overall journey.
I'm not associated with it, I just find it very profound and effective.